I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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