omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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