cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
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