just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
