Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
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I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
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We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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