Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
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He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
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Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Who put my cat in the fridge?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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