Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Your cock deserves a montage
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
