whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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