On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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