I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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