i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
