so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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