if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize