THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
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Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
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You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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