so that wasnt chicken after all
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
