Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize