There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize