We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
