Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize