That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
