I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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