Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
