it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
