My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
