Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
