if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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