i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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