I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
