I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
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