Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
