I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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