I must be too annoying 4 u.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
