just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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