come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I just forgot I was standing up.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I love you. Go after that dick
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