so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
he laminated a picture of his dick.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
