I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Let the clothes fall where they may.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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