I wanna bring you to show and tell
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
