They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
