No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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