This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
