the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize