Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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