Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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