u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Randomize
