Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize