Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
