what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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