Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
