We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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