he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Randomize
